~카 구 라 요 ~

you’re not my diary, nor brother

you’re not my teacher who can give me lecture

or boss who can give me instructions and view my confidential papers

you’re not even my buddy…

and even sometime i think, you don’t have any right and authority to find out about me

why i was so dumdum letting it out? you are mean and made me upsad most the time

and i still forgive you

although you don’t trust me, i put mine without doubt

till now

they’re all because you are my friend…

There was a doll, just an ordinary doll. It wasn’t made by porcelain nor silk. Just so ordinary that you could say that it may be from the op shop.

The owner likes to play with it, and for sure this doll likes to play along too. She gave many different names for different story line, she made her doll became a princess who waits for prince charming, or she made the doll becoming a knight who fights for survival. Sometimes, they go to places to discover new scenes from many different angles, they play tea and munchies, brunch and supper, and even try to be a chef.

Each day the stories always different, but to think that way, it’s good to have different colour in life~!

One day, her friends teased that she had an op shop toys. So she put the doll in the cupboard and left it there….

Day by day, although she plays with her doll (not that very often now), there are differences when playing with it. The doll no longer becomes anyone else. Perhaps the owner doesn’t have any more desires to play with it anymore, as she realizes that her toy just came from the op shop, has bit of wear and tear. “Only silly people would play with that kind of toy” she thought…

Moral of the story is: It’s good to think that the owner has grown up and thinks differently, people change, and has to be, as they need to be part in the community. But the question is: what happens to the toy? Meaning.. What happen to all the memories that have been made up; wouldn’t it be sad to think back again… or… is it better to erase the memories permanently? And move on.. only time will be able to fade all the impacts

Life is a book in chapters three,

The past, the present, the yet-to-be

The past has gone – it could not stay,

It’s in your dreams of yesterday,

Remembered sometimes for its sadness,

But also for its joy and gladness.

Live for the present, live for today

So quickly does it pass away.

Help one another along life’s path.

Cheer them up and make them laugh.

For the past it soon will be.

So live it now – it’s yours, you see.

But what about yet-to-be?

It’s locked away – God holds the key

source unknown

how is it spose to be

like writting up the sentence

. or ,

i have to consider many things too

should i keep going?

fight till the end

or i think it’s better to stop

open a new page

and write something new

, or .

well, so far, i dunno what to say, think or do

i might have something to say but i dunno if this is the right time

or even the right attitude…

pehaps i should wait… but will this be too late to decide?

i guess the time will tell, i shall wait and see…

what a pain that i have to think about it all the time,

but at the same time i don’t want to forget…

bittersweet

that’s wat i would call it now…

lost - confusion - scared

hey hey buttercup,

there are lots of pathways that you need to choose,

many rocks that slow you down

but for sure you can do it!

even if many people ditched you

don’t you worry about that

remember how strong you were

way before you meet anyone that could make you loose yourself

when you said that you can’t go back to the past

let it pass and try new ways

many different things that you need to try

so you know the purpose of life.

if you say many bitter things that made you feel sad,

let it flow

as it will give you strength somehow

don’t you worry if you’re down,

when you’re feeling blue,

or even when you feel hopeless at all,

time will unbound all of that and you will find a light

just remember that you can live your life

even if you think it’s the hardest thing

you can do it..

think, pray and hope!

Oma~!!!

‘happy belated birthday’

i miss you…  well i guess you know all my story now..

visit me when i sleep okay… so i can dream about you`

luv n hugs

tirutitut~~!!

It’s never been easy for me

To find words to go along with a melody

But this time there’s actually something on my mind

So please forgive these few brief awkward lines

Since I met you, my whole life has changed

It’s not just my furniture you’ve rearranged

I was living in the past but somehow you’ve brought me back

And I haven’t felt like this since before Frankie said “relax”

And though I know

Based on my track record

I might not seem like the safest bet

All I’m asking you

Is don’t write me off just yet

For years I’ve been telling myself the same old story

That I’m happy to live off my so called former glories

But you’ve given me a reason to take another chance

Now I need you despite the fact that you’ve killed all my plants

And though I know

I’ve already blown more chances

Than anyone should ever get

All I’m asking you

Is don’t write me off just yet

Is don’t write me off just yet

(C) music anc lyric

wat a day`! full so unexpected plans… oh well.. at least the goal still the same, to life your life fully.

lots of notes to be learned, while many experiences that forcely you to learn about living and life. but i reckon time keep changing so quickly and yet so many stuffs happening, its a chaos!~!

it’s about a year or so, buttercup alive again`~!! and for sure.. she who learned so many bitter things last year, wouldn’t fall for the second time… (or would she~?) well, stay tune ~` many things happening to her, and yet she still doesn’t know what to do~~  big help`!! but i guess it’s only her decision that matter.

for sure there’s not right or wrong decision, only what ever you decide is the one that you want to be responsible to do till the end….  so i guess that there are many different path ways, or even alternatives that you can walk on this life, even though there are positive and negatives aspects, but i guess in the end they’re all worth to walk.

totally“!! well i reckon i just dreamd my own home bak then in indo`! miss them so dearly, while i doubt it would be the same. well, i might just recall wat i dreamd, that i wanted to see my oma, opa, and my past home, schools and friends, but realised when i got up… it was just a dream.

wish when i go back there… i wanna see my old friends.. whom we don’t realli talk much now… even though we have each other company "online" i reckon we had own busy-ness~ so yagh.. i even doubt wat will i do when i visit there.

ah those memories just a shillouete that drifting me pass… life for the future i guess, that you can’t turn back time. but sometimes, dreams are sweeter than reality. wat a dreamer~!!